This is the first book I ever finished! Feel free to read the original version or the new and improved version. I also created an RPG that connects to this book and the second and third book so feel free to read those when your done!
Well I hope you enjoy this! Just to warn you there may been some creepy parts to the book, romance and gore.
Please feel free to give comments. Don't copy this either please. This is my hard work, I put it up here for people to enjoy, not copy. Thank you and enjoy! -^-^-
First version: Pg 1-27
Rewritten version: Pg 28-
On the other side of another world from earth is a wonderful kingdom. The kingdom is perfect in every way, without sickness or death and the people live there happily forever and ever. The King of this kingdom is known as The Great King, for he is better than any other king who has come. He is the one who created the universe and everything within it with his awesome and magnificent power. Everyone in the kingdom has incredible powers and can do things no human could do, but the King has such power that all tremble before him. Even though he is frightening he is also loving and loves all of his people so much that no one can even begin to understand how much he does.
One day, one of the King’s closest advisors decided he wanted power like his master and he wanted to become a great king. So secretly he began plotting and working out an idea of how he could take down the King. When he felt ready he took his own son, who was a mind reader, and mutated him until he created his own power, a dark and vile power. A power that destroys and eats away not like The Great King had created and planned. In secret he taught his son how to harness his powers in hopes of destroying The Great King. What he never expected was his own son wanted power for himself. In his greed he killed his own father and went after the throne himself. The Great King was not one to loose though and in an epic battle defeated the boy. The Great King was furious with him though and banished him to the other side where the mortals lived.
The boy grew and made a name for himself “The great lord” and he was the terror of the land and mutated a few more of his kind quickly multiplying and creating his own kingdom. He had a son of his own who took his place and did even more evil then his father. Slowly their kind created enough of themselves to attack the largest nation on the planet beginning the longest war the world had and would, ever know…
Characters: (Spoiler Alert!)
Here's a pic of Darson, He would look older, have slightly darker hair, eyes would be less creepy and he wouldn't be pouting.
Mike, the bully
Darson's mom. I never really gave her a name. She wouldn't be sad though.
So this pic is the closest I could get to Newton. He'd have black hair and green eyes though.
Heres Miya! If her hair was just the tiny bit longer she'd be perfect.
This pic kinda looks like Rea. She would have more orange in her hair and have yellow eyes.
Adamina! (thank you Zhadow!!!!)
Levi's mask! (^)
Levi (v) (He would have purple eyes)
How to pronounce some words
Darson: Not Darsin, but Darson (kinda french)
Felixivent: felixE vent
Galena (gal E na)
Galenian (gal E n E in)
(If you find any other hard to pronounce words in this book plz tell me)
OOOO! That's awesome!
^^ Glad you like! I thought I should write something that would connect lots of little things together
I think this is wrong.The people in this story seem to have powers that only demon posesed people would have and I highly discourage this!!!
Sorry I did not see the whole picture
Plus there should be no stories that have someone that created the universe other than the Author or God!!!
The Great King is a representation of God in the prologue she wrote.
Ouch... I'm hurt... I think powers are pretty cool and I'm totally not trying to encourage demons or anything, in fact I'm rewriting this to be a Godly book. If you read the new prologue you may be able to see this. In the prologue that great king is God... it's Allegory. Though I do understand the way you think I totally don't mean for it to be that way. I just wanted to make a story that really gets your imagination going.
Sorry I did not try hurt your feelings. I totally understand now. I did not read the rewritten version it is just one of my friends started to read books with demon-like powers and he started to make bad friends and make bad decisions. Plus most manga books or characters came from the orient were they worshiped demons and other things. So keep the Truth i your mind just in case: "Hebrews 11:3 By faith we understand that the universe was created by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things that are visible."ESV
Thanks! I'm glad you understand now. I totally see where your coming from too. Manga can be extremely dangerous. One wrong move and you can see or read something really nasty. The first manga I ever read was a Christian one though I've found a few more since so I've had it pretty good.
Hope you enjoy!